It’s been so long since I cried so heartwrenchingly so. My chest feels so heavy and tight. I am shattered. Apart in my skin. And I’ve never felt so worthless before until now. Like I’m in the bottom of the barrel. And all I feel is self-pity for I am so worthless. I would die in this world and although few would miss me, but not that much for I know I have never done anything in this world worth anything at all, no one will truly look for me. I could die in my room right now and no one would know until I’m very cold and gray.

And I am indeed worthless, its a fact. And nobody really knows me… who I really truly am. My family and friends, specially, the man who I thought who loves me can go on with their lives being happy and having fun.. not thinking of me. I could easily be forgotten. Taken for granted by everyone.

For months now I’ve been looking for love inside books, devouring every word for word. Wishing I am the woman in the book that the man really really love with his whole heart and with so much devotion. No one ofcourse, can find perfect love, but everyone deserves to be loved and for months and months now… I’ve felt unloved.

Maybe I’m just wasting my tears… but right now I dont care, I’ll be sleeping on wet pillows tonight.


3 Responses to “unloved”

  1. I know exactly how you feel. I felt like that for years and years, but instead of books, I lost myself in video games.

    Just remember, there is that one person out there somewhere who will make you feel like you’ve never felt before. This person may not live in the same city, or even the same country as you, but one day, you will find each other. Just don’t keep your heart completely closed off or you will miss it, but don’t open it too wide or you WILL find somebody, but maybe not the person your soul is searching for. You probably won’t find this person tomorrow, or even next week, and you may not find each other even in the next year, but don’t give up, because the person who will love you unconditionally and who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated will find you when you both are truly ready.

    Concerning your family, they do love you. Even if they don’t always show it, and even if they act like jerks sometimes, they still love you. Just open up your heart a little bit and give them a bit of trust and you will see that they truly love and care about you.

  2. Thank you so much! I’m not big on words but I seriously appreciate your comment

  3. Maybe my statements will sound cynical but is it really essential to be loved? One of the simplest truths that my mom taught me was that you can never make someone love you.
    It is something that should come naturally. The only was to survive is to act indiffrent to the people who do not love you instead of constantly craving for their attention.
    Love the ones who love you.
    Maybe love is just waiting around the corner, so cheer up and live life to the fullest.
    Let love come to you when the time comes!

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